Too often, we spend too much time thinking about where we have been versus where we want to go. I believe this is a common therapy trap and is also at the root of epic failure in creating more appreciative and joyful feelings in real-time. People spend years—sometimes lifetimes—contemplating all the reasons behind what they perceive as their failings or failures in life. All the while, time passes, and success seems to slip further away.
I propose that what I’ll call “The Justification Trap” is real. It’s likely the top reason people stay stuck in rationalization or justification of whatever they deem “failure” or what they resist instead of accepting. The more this resistance is fed with too much thought (read that as wasting the present moment), the greater the likelihood that whatever we desire remains elusive.
As the saying goes, “Hindsight may bring insight,” but far more relevant from my perspective is the time and energy spent focused on where we want to go, how we plan on getting there, what skills we may need to hone to excel, and when we are going to put it all into action. This is the real secret to not just success but joyful living in the present.
© Dian Griesel 2025
